Jasper Jowls to Quit 82nd and Foster Chuck E Cheese Band

Portland– Its official, Jasper T Jowls has turned in his banjo for the last time, at least with the 82nd Ave Pizza Time Players. Jasper T Jowls quit the group last Friday. As one of the founding members of the band who was credited for writing such hits as “Pizza Smash” and “Throw Pizza at your Face” is citing irreconcilable differences for stepping away. Rumors for months have been swirling that Jasper is upset for playing second fiddle to Chuck E Cheese for so long. An insider interview under request of anonymity was quoted as saying that it is time for Jasper to “spread his wings in the solo world.”

Recently, other reports have surfaced that are bit more messy. After Jasper’s bitter divorce to Helen Henny reports came out that infidelity by Ms. Henny and Chuck E Cheese may have played a factor. Chuck E Cheese has a history of womanizing with a recent list of women companions such as Krusty the Cat and Dolly Dimples. When asked for an interview Chuck E Cheese denied saying “ Let’s Rock.”